Support Group For Equestrians Overcoming Rider Fear

redhedstudio 23 posts Aug 19, 2008 6:28 PM	Whether I've been reading advice directly from you or topics for others, this site has been a HUGE HELP!!! Since joining, I've been able to come a thousand miles (ok, some days its a thousand steps, but who cares? progress is progress). I have a horrible fear of trail riding, based simply on lack of experience and the fact that most of our trails seem a bit daunting. Not sure where it came from, but I did get dumped on the trail in March (only my pride was hurt, thankfully), and some of our trails are narrow and scary. So, since I've been back after my broken collarbone in November, I've stuck to the arenas, with the one exception. When the beautiful weather arrived I started to get sick of wistfully watching my friends go trail riding after an arena hack, yet the heart-palpitating-get-me-the-defribullator-i'm-freaking-at-the-thought-of-the-trail panick attacks kept me stuck in the arena. After reading some posts, I thought I'd try to go out a little at a time. I started with 100 feet and only went out with friends or my trainer, who's been very understanding. Then a quarter mile up the road. Then to the hay barn (half a mile). Then I had a lesson out in the field. I cried during it, but cantered anyway and proved that you can do both at once, but neither will be pretty. Then I went 10 feet past the hay barn. All this took two months. Then I went past the hay barn by myself. Alone with Red. And it was better that way. Quiet, peaceful. He put his head down willingly and walked like an Olympic horse, with long graceful strides. I think he loves being out in the open. I learned a lot from Red. He is generally not spooky (he does have his moments occasionally)- and he's very curious. Psychologically, curiosity is the opposite of fear. So I thought "lets play with that idea and see what happens if I try it".... Some days the philosophy worked better than others, but on Sunday I went past the hay barn by myself, into the field, and a bit up the hillside. Then I went for a trot and 10 paces of a joyful canter... and I thought that this was the best thing in the world and in my heart I was thanking everyone on this website for their insights. so thank you and keep offering your bits of wisdom and humor! I don't think my fear is totally cured, but maybe its just a little better, at least for today and that's enough! Jennifer Last Edited on 19-Aug-2008 6:47 PM
DixieMom 541 posts Aug 19, 2008 10:53 PM	You are doing so well! Little steps is what helps your confidence. Try to think about sitting deeply into your saddle. It helps you relax and also makes your seat more secure. When we are tense (even a little) we stiffen and it makes it easier to get bumped out of the saddle if something unexpected happens. If you sit deeply and still be balanced through some spooks, you can be pretty confident of sitting just about anything. Focus on the JOY you are having in the moment - don't lose that! Spooks will happen - fact of life. But that doesn't have to rob you of joy when you ride. Dixie Mom "The art of riding: Keeping a horse between you and the ground!"
dog-shrink 345 posts Aug 20, 2008 2:16 AM	You are doing so well. Out on the trail is very different to the arena but it's what I want too. My fear of them has been decreased by going with a trekking centre on nice calm follow my leader horses. I also now go out with Howard on short rides around the neighbouring fields. Each time we go a bit further, just as you have done. Well done to canter outside - I've yet to do that on my horse. Just goes to show that taking it bit by bit pays off. Well done you! ---------- Bitless - not witless!
Determined 309 posts Aug 20, 2008 7:13 AM	Oh, Jennifer, what a fabulous story. You should be so proud of yourself! You will be an inspiration to lots of people on this site who are struggling to get where you are. Be aware that your fear has probably not gone away. I'm not saying this to deflate your balloon. I just don't want you to be devastated when it returns. And it probably will. It sure threw me for a loop when mine returned, since I figured it was long gone. But all it takes is a quick flashback. Something, anything that takes your mind back to that incident or place that initially scared you. So, please don't be alarmed or dismayed if that happens. The good part is that even if it returns, you now have the key and because you have done it once you KNOW deep in your heart that you can do it again. Meanwhile, keep taking those baby steps and enjoy the process. Good for you girl - way to go!!!!!
AlbuquerqueCathy 35 posts Aug 20, 2008 11:38 AM	Jennifer, definitely been where you've been and way to go! The last post is true, the fear will return but hopefully not as gripping as the first time. I was reading Bonnie Marlewski's book on debugging your horse and she made a wonderful suggestion. Sit on your horse on vertical center, then pivot your body with legs slightly ahead of center and shoulders a bit behind center. Now try to stand up in the stirrups! Exactly! You can't. She says this is the best seat to get you deep in the saddle and ride out a buck or take off. I practiced it last weekend on my horse who has an awful hard trot that KILLS my back. Well, it helped me stay much better in the saddle and WITH his movements and I wasn't afraid at all of falling off. It's a fabulous tool. That might help you. I had a bad habit of when a horse would speed up, etc, I'd be ahead of center w/ my upper body. Bad idea and makes the horse unbalanced. Way to go and just keep on keeping on a ride at a time.
dog-shrink 347 posts Aug 21, 2008 3:50 AM	Hey Albuquerque You are the very first person who has explained to me how to "sit deep" in the saddle. Everyone says it but I didn't know how! So I tried it today on the trek. Yes! You kind of push your hips forward a bit and your shoulders back. I felt much deeper in the saddle. I've been trying to achieve this for ages. Thank-you thank-you so much! Unfortuantely (but rightly so) I didn't get a chance to practice it at canter as the group had a complete beginner and we only did a bit of trotting. Never mind, there's plenty of time. I'm going to try on Iroquois tomorrow and see how that improves my seat. I have a terrible habit of leaning forward but if I keep reminding myself of the hips, shoulders thing I can correct myself. This may be the best piece of riding advice I've had in ages!!!!! ---------- Bitless - not witless!
LC 106 posts Aug 21, 2008 5:11 AM	Yes it is a brilliant piece of advice. I've only recently 'got it' and I do feel a LOT more secure during spooks. :0) - (Zack always seems to 'need' to have at LEAST 2 on a 1 hour hack!!) I do find it difficult to get the right position when trotting though, yesterday Louise was telling me I was tipping forward when I rose which I think is why, when something unexpected happens, I always end up lurching forward over his neck! I expect I'll 'get that' as well at some point though! Bye for now Megan
AlbuquerqueCathy 37 posts Aug 21, 2008 11:53 AM	I think of it as pushing on the pedals w/ my stirrups which pushes my leg a little forward of center and that automatically makes my upper body move backward, like a teeter-totter.